"Philby, I am your mother! I don't need to hear things like that! And listen to me, I do NOT want you writing that!"
"Writing what?"
"The thing about America's Funniest Home Videos."
"You don't think that's funny?!"
"No, I don't!"
"Really?! I can't think of anything that's ever been funnier!"
"Listen to me, I'm your mother! I'm telling you, it is NOT funny. You're the only one that thinks things like that are funny. Why do you think horrible things are funny?"
"You really don't think it's funny?"
"No, not in the least!"
"See, that's how I know when something's REALLY funny!... Hey, did I tell you about the Kenny Chesney suicide letter I wrote?"
"Ugh, PHILBY! I swear you're gonna..."
"Come on. You don't think that's funny?!"
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