COME ON, I LIKE A LOT OF THINGS!

I like that cat on the old Eveready batteries. I like seeing people trip. I like catching old men checking out young girls' asses. I love seeing mangy ferrel cats disappear into the woods when I'm running. I like dead flies on window sills or at the bottom of light fixtures. I like looking at large men's hands and old people's elbows. I like seeing people standing outside of buildings, smoking, thinking while on a break. I like seeing the pilot's hands reach out and flip all those switches when I get on a plane. I like decrepit, vacant buildings and houses. I like seeing old couches and tires tossed off to the side of a road. I like hearing people not be able to start their car. I like seeing couples sitting miserable in silence at restaurants. I like seeing people obviously pretending to be interested in a painful conversation and the person talking, completely unaware of it, and actually mistaking their lack of rebuttal as further interest. I like catching children looking at anything up in the sky. I like it when squirrels flip their tails and bark at me. I like seeing pictures of myself from times when I was fat and drunk and miserable and insane. I mean, this is endless. I could go on and on. But more than anything, I just love being wrong. Wrong about anything and everything. I mean, don't you?