Monday, February 17, 2014

COLOSTOMY BAGS ARE HOT!

I don't know, I'm just not that impressed with any sort of athleticism anymore. Of course you will be great at something if you have the luxury of spending all your goddamn time doing it. And then if you're quite gifted, then the sky's the limit. But then what? What the hell does it matter? The agility of your average house cat is far more impressive than anyone on the Olympic gymnastic team. I'm just far more impressed with the daily doings of some poor bastard who has to live with a colostomy bag. Now, if someone played football or were in the NBA with a colostomy bag, you better believe I'd be watching that. Or hey, wouldn't that make for a good season of the Bachelor or The Bachelorette? Have them have a colostomy bag. See how much that pathetic herd stays in pursuit when they finally discover where that godawful smell has been coming from!
Hey, I enjoy all sorts of pleasantries, past and present. I love stupid old movies and television shows, and I'm nostalgic for lots of music that should've never been made. I suppose the difference is that I find myself simultaneously thinking about the horrors of the world or in my own life that were going on at the time. It's like the other day when I flipped the channel and saw that Caddyshack was on. I love Caddyshack, I grew up on Caddyshack. But now, of course, what you must do if you ever find yourself watching Caddyshack, is to also Google "1980s atrocities". Between the two is the realm I'm in search of. Yes, all things must be put into that brutal perspective. GO SOONERS!

Thursday, February 13, 2014

JUST THINK

there are people alive that have never been truly afraid of the wind!